I offically think this photo sums up how our family makes you feel being lugged around to everything we do. Dad took Kael and Eden somewhere the other day and I had you home to myself and I just had YOU. You weren't neglected and I still got stuff done and you seemed so happy to just have Mom. Being the 3rd kid must really be a lot of work. Your schedule is always being thrown off by something t-ball, dance, primary, church stuff, friends, play dates, family outings. You name it and your schedule comes in second. Maybe that is why you have been my hardest baby. I don't know.
For the most part, during the day this is you. My smiling, happy baby. You love life. You love your family. You love to play and explore. You really are happy. You now have 6 teeth. You weigh 17 lbs 5 oz. You are 50% for height and weight and about 75% for head circumference. Yup, you have a big head. It's ok though, the doctor says you will grow into it. At the most recent doctor's appointment (you've had a lot lately) the doctor said you still have a heart murmur. Eventually someday we will have to get an echo done, and they will have to sedate you. My hope is that it goes away before they do this. You will probably be around 5. Having the murmur is not a problem and lots of people live with them and don't even know it. Grandma Heaton has one. It just seems like I needed one more thing to worry about on this earth. I know you will be fine, just something to always stay in the back of my mind. You have been sick for the last week. You are a little more whiney during the day and then you have a hard time breathing at night. It hasn't helped with having your reflux and not sleeping at night. You officially went to waking up at least every 2 to 3 hours if not more. I'm really really tired kid. I think we finally got the reflux under control a bit. We changed your medication around a bit, but the zantac seems to help the most. We are going to have to up the dose soon too. The doctor's keep saying that by a year you should be so much better. The problem is I don't want you to be a year old and I want to enjoy this now. Dad gave me a blessing the other night and you too. It was really nice. You still are up a ton at night and are still sick, but somehow I feel peaceful with it all and handle it so much better now. I think it is because I know I need to just enjoy you right now the way you are. You aren't going to miraculously change and start sleeping at night, or not wake up in pain from reflux at least once a week. You are who you are. Your body is what it is. Eventually you will sleep. Eventually things will get better, but for now you and me kid we have our late night sleep over parties. And sometime we do party. If you are really struggling with reflux sometimes I can get you to watch a show on the kindle with me and that seems to calm you down until you fall asleep again. It is also hard because you have no way to soothe yourself. You don't like pacifiers, you don't suck your thumb, and you have nothing special you really love. What you really love is Mom. I am your comfort. Maybe just maybe I can find something else that will help you soothe yourself, we will see.
You really are the most amazing little girl Elara. You love your brother and sister. You were made for our family. I had a hard time imagining life with you in our family before you got here. Now, you are our world. Kael and Eden play with you every morning. You have Dad wrapped around your finger. You make our family complete.
A little about what you are doing.
You can stand up and hold on to things. Sometimes you let go and can stand for a couple seconds without holding anything.
You crawl like a maniac. I have to ask Kael where you are all the time because I can't find you. Usually you sneak into the big kids room where all the toys are and just entertain yourself. Or, you sneak into the kitchen and start opening drawers and cupboards and playing with whatever you can get your hands on.
You love to feed yourself. You are not a big fan of baby food at all. You want to eat like a grown up. You have the silliest pincher grasp with your thumb and forefinger. It is hilarious!
You love peas, carrots, olives, avocados, bananas, chewing on a whole apple, pasta, just anything that we will let you feed yourself really.
You wear a size 3 diaper.
You bite me ALL the time. Ouch. Stop that would you. Teething has been a pain for you too. 6 teeth now when Kael and Eden were barely getting their first 2. You have to do everything faster than Kael and Eden did. I swear you will be walking in a month just to prove a point.
Your hair is strawberry blonde.
You take 2 naps a day when I remember. Sometimes you get 3 cat naps.
You can say Da da.
You love to blow raspberries, and make a noise with your finger on your lips. You think you are communicating. But, you refuse to try to even say Ma ma.
Da da is all you want to say.
The big kids really wear you out, but you try to keep up with them. You want to be where ever they are and doing whatever they are doing.
You love taking a bath with the big kids.
You do almost everything with purpose. You are very aware of things around you and you don't do something unless you know what you are doing and why. Purpose.
I love you Elara Jane. You make me smile even when I'm really really tired. Like right now as you woke up for your normal 10:30 wake up.
I pray life gets a little easier for you. It's been a rough start for us both. I know we can make it together. That is what families are for right?!
Thanks for being my baby girl even though you are growing too fast and don't want that role for long. You will always be my baby. I love you to the moon and back kiddo!
Love,
Ma Ma
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